Wednesday, April 19, 2006
It's about time!
In the wake of the publication of the Book of Judas the Iscariot clan which has been forced to live in relative obscurity in Argentina for nearly 2000 years are confering with attorneys to determine the viability of any legal action that could be taken against all christendom for defamation of character and the resultant emotional distress suffered by Judas' progeny.
The clan's designated spokesperson, Kenny Iscariot addressed a large contingent of media reps with a terse and emotional statement:
"Enough is enough. We knew the truth would finally win out. Our patriarch, Judas, would never have fingered his pal and saviour, Jesus, to the Romans. Certainly not for a handful of coins. Judas had, in fact, been doing quite well in palm frond futures. Of course the whole crucifixion thing put an end to that. His business never recovered being that it was built entirely on trust. In our efforts to get this case into a courtroom, be assured it's not "the bag of silver" we're after. We seek justice for Judas, and exoneration of the Iscariot name, so that we can once again hold our heads up high. Thank you."
It is unclear just where any such case might be heard, here in Argentina, Israel, or perhaps Rome. Attorney Martin Slobberman of Gideon, James & King, the firm representing the family, stated that the case could be brought "wherever christians gather." It is speculated that a court victory for the plaintiffs in this case could cost christians hundreds of billions in reparations what with nearly 2000 years of inflation and accumulated interest. Also, there is some speculation that all jewry could join in such a suit as co-plaintiffs. An announcement from the Knesset may be forthcoming.
This is Matt Fisher in Buenos Aires. Back to you, Mark.